Competent Communication

When thinking of 'competent communication' one must realize that "it needs to be both effective and appropriate." Effective in that the cultural, situational, contextual aspect are taken into account and the message is delivered through the proper channel; in addition to the message itself being appropriate for the cultural setting, situation, and context in which the communicators are immersed  (O'Hair & Wiemann, 2012)  
With that said, one person that communicates well and demonstrate competent communication is my father when lecturing his children.  He is always calm and seldom yells.  He always addressed the issue head on and explains to us why we are yet again being lectured.  He respects the fact that we have different ideas and listens to them prior to explaining why in our family certain behaviors are unacceptable.  Now that a majority of us are in adulthood, even when he disagrees, he never makes us feel that our differing ways of thinking is somewhat less then.  He simply respects that we are adults and have a different opinion than he does.
I would love to have the ability to remain calm like he does when discussing issues that I am passionate about.  I have also learned from him how to respect others' opinions even when they differ from mine.  I have learn how to be fair to others and to myself and continue to learn from him on a daily basis.
I would love to mimic my father's communication style because his integrity is reflected in his interactions. Reference
O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.